This is the text of a sermon I gave to the First Unitarian Church of New Bedford sometime in August, 2008. I’m posting it here because I took it off the church website.
Good morning.
Why I sing. First, I want to deal with the pretension in the title. I don’t think I‘m enough of a singer my motivations are particularly interesting. Maybe B.B. King, Tony Bennet, or Nellie Furtado should be giving this talk; they aren’t here.
Rather, I approach it from the other angle. I think that everyone has one or two good sermons in them. These sermons could be titled “Why I _____” (fill in the blank.) Why I am an usher. Why I am on the religious services committee. Why I run the Universal Thrift Store. Those sermons are for other people. I sing.
I’m not sure that there is such a thing as singing talent. Singing, to me, is a skill, like playing golf, driving a car, or writing a sermon. Keep doing it, and you’ll get better. And in a society of listeners, it doesn’t take very long to get better than average.
My father was a very skilled singer. He had lessons when he was in high school and sang a lot in church and in school. He spent the summer between high school and college traveling around the country as a member of a German Baptist men’s quartet. While in college and Divinity School, I’ve been told that Dad was the singer around Rochester, New York for weddings and parties. Even in the 1960’s, he still had some of the sheet music from those days, two large file drawers packed tight. Doing some rough calculating, it would have taken about 300 hours to sing every song in those drawers. The songs went from the sublime, like Ol’ Man River, to the ridiculous, Stout Hearted Men.
The story goes that when my father wanted to show off in his college years, he would lie down on the floor and invite the largest guy in the room to stand on his stomach. Then he would bounce that guy up and down, using his stomach muscles. This was from a man who never intentionally did a sit up or an ab crunch in his life. If a person sings correctly for a while, he or she will develop physically.
Another thing that Dad developed was a strong speaking voice. To my knowledge, he never preached using a microphone. In fact, one time he was guest preaching and the microphone was on at its usual setting and Dad caused it to feed back from fifteen feet away.
I have another story. When I was a teenager, Dad sang in the church choir in Youngstown, Ohio. It was the practice in those days for the choir to sing a “choral Amen” after the closing words. This a just a little bit of music to give the minister a head start so that he could get into position in the back of the church to greet the congregation. The choir had four or five, mostly from the back of the hymnal, which they sang in turn. One of them called for the bass to sing a low Eb. Now the church was constructed in such a way that it vibrated when that note was sung loud enough. It didn’t happen on an E or a D: just on Eb. And the windows would shake. For many people in the congregation, that was the high point of the whole service. The minister could spend hours working on his sermon and twenty minutes delivering it, and Dad could overshadow him by singing one note for about a second. As I was at an impressionable age, this made an impression on me.
Neither of my parents stressed singing as a particularly worthy thing to do. When we went on long trips, the whole family would sing. My father would sing the melody, and I figured out how to sing the upper harmony because it was the only choice I had. Nobody sang lower harmony to my dad. Then my voice changed.
In my high school, the choir and the band both rehearsed at the same time. I was in the band. The band got into the football games for free, and they had these cool semi-military uniforms. Besides, they almost always went to the state finals in the band competitions, which meant I could spend a night in a hotel, throw water balloons and generally go wild. To tell the truth, the general feeling in my school was that the choir was for sissies.
In college, like many boys at that time, I bought a guitar. It was from a pawnshop, cost $15 and I got a raw deal. Over a long period of time, I learned most of the grips and strums necessary to accompany my singing. I always had roommates, so I developed a style of singing softly and weakly, hunched around the guitar so I couldn’t get enough air if I had wanted to.
By my late twenties, I was living in San Francisco and attending services regularly at the local Unitarian Church. The minister was David Rankin, who some of you might remember. He used examples from this church often in his sermons. One Sunday, the Minister of Music took the pulpit to invite people to join the choir. He made singing in the choir sound like it could be fun.
So on the next Thursday, I went and found the music room. I made my way through the mass of people who were chatting happily and introduced myself to the conductor. He was a cheery guy, who gave me his name then asked, “What voice do you sing?” Oh great, you mean I’ve got a choice. He must have read something from my face, because he said, “Why don’t you go and sit in front of the big guy with the mustache.”
I introduced myself the other men sitting near me and took a piece of sheet music as it was passed around. Then the conductor rapped on his music stand with his baton.
“Okay, lets read through this music one time.”
I panicked. Read! What do you mean read! I can’t read! This was a huge mistake! I’m going to make a fool of myself! There were only three reasons that I didn’t bolt from the room right then: the tenors, the altos, and the sopranos. Everybody in the choir was between the door and me.
So the conductor started waving his arms and cacophony struck. If music is the organization of melody, harmony and rhythm, there was no music in that room. I played my role in the confusion, trying quietly to follow the notes and failing miserably.
Finally, the conductor stopped waving his arms. “That was pretty good for the first time through. We’re getting better. Let’s try it again.”
The second time was better, marginally. For one thing, the big guy with the mustache started getting some confidence, and sometimes he was singing the same thing as the piano. By the fourth time through, I was gaining some confidence and adding my quavering folk singer’s voice to the bass section’s sound.
That first song established the rhythm of the rehearsal. We went through 7 or 8 pieces of music, repeating each many times, improving a little each time. Throughout the rehearsal, I gained more and more confidence as I realized that no one was listening to me.
After the rehearsal was over, the conductor asked me, “Well, what do you think.”
“It was fun.”
“We’ll have more fun at 9:00 on Sunday in the choir loft. Drop by.”
Then big guy with the mustache invited me to join the choir for a beer at Tommy’s Joynt a block away. I was in the choir.
It turns out that there are people who can pick up a sheet of music, and read it and sing it. There are also people who can pick up 500 pounds or run for 20 miles without collapsing. All three are rare skills.
As time went on, I started having fun singing. But I was still one of the softest voices in the choir. There was a bunch of people who were a foot shorter than I was and who weighed 50 pounds less who could effortlessly drown me out so that I couldn’t even hear myself.
One day, I asked the conductor what was wrong with me. He said, “Let’s try something.” He then sat down at the piano and had me sing various vowel sounds at various pitches. Suddenly, he interrupted me.
“There, did you hear that?”
“What?’
“That last note you sang was twice as loud as the others.”
“It was?”
“Yes, you used your natural resonance on that note. I’m sorry. I should have known better and gone with that sound first. But if you sing like that you’ll never have any trouble being heard.”
So we repeated some exercises to fix this new way of singing in my head and in my muscles and then went for a beer. That was when I became a singer. The entire session had taken 5 minutes.
Shortly after that, it was suggested that I probably should sit in the back row. In essence, I became the big guy with the mustache who taught other people the part.
I really got into singing. At one point, I was in two choirs, had a weekly music lesson, and was in an opera workshop. I was singing six nights a week. For fun, I would go down the Roundup, a bar on the corner, and sing country and western songs.
That was in San Francisco. Since then, I lived in Tucson for eight years, Newburyport, Mass for ten, and here in New Bedford for another 10. Every time I go to a new church, I can reasonably sure that someone will invite me to join the choir. I’ve accepted every reasonable invitation. I’ve also sung in barbershop choruses, at blues jams, and at folk music open mics. I’ll take just about any opportunity to sing.
I really enjoy in this church’s folk choir. With most choirs, a singer’s job is pretty simple: Figure out what the director wants and give it to him. No less and certainly no more. And people don’t become directors because they are shy and undemanding. With this choir, every singer has responsibility for the end result. We create our own harmonies and our own arrangements. Mostly, I sing the bass part, but often sing the melody. I’ve even sung an upper harmony part or two when the song needs it.
Singing for me is multi-tasking taken to the extreme. I’m checking to make sure that I’m doing all the technical things right: back straight, chest up, breathing from diaphragm, opening mouth wide. Next, I’m listening to the accompaniment; am I on pitch, am I someplace near the rhythm. Then, I’m paying attention to the other singers; are we singing together, presenting some sort of coherent sound? Are we jelling? Then I’m interacting with the congregation, getting constant feedback. Are they transported? Are they interested? Are they comfortable? Are they resigned? Are they awake? And finally, I’m concentrating on the words. I’ve learned that if I don’t pay attention to the words, no one else will and I might as well be playing a kazoo.
And, if everything goes well, a strange and wonderful thing happens. I forget who I am. I overwhelm that sound track that’s always going in my brain. The one that says,” I’m Ted Schade, I’m at church, I’m a little hot and sweaty, I wonder what kind of cookies they’ll have at coffee hour, my knee itches.” I take a short vacation from myself. It’s the exact opposite of meditating. With meditating, you try to empty your mind. When singing, I try to fill my mind to overflowing. When I finish singing well, I really have no sense of time passing and have to make a conscious effort to get back into the world.
In this talk, I’ve tried to do two contradictory things. I’ve invoked the magic of music and I’ve attempted to demystify it.
I do think that music is magical. A person’s voice box vibrates, which causes the air to vibrate, which causes a person’s eardrum to vibrate which can cause that person to feel the whole range of emotions that person is capable of. But singing is also a skill, a skill that almost everyone has. Babies will sing to themselves long before they learn to speak or read or even to go to the bathroom. Personally, I find it worth the effort, physically, spiritually, emotionally and intellectually. And it’s not bad for the ego, either.